24hrs in Singapore

24hrs in Singapore

They say your first impression is also your last. And, like a sweaty handshake, Singapore will not be forgotten.

I’m a good judge of character, and I like what I see. The city is clean and safe, and it feels so young – a term which, in other places, can mean a lack character. But not here. The unabashed extravagance is a character of its own. It’s like playing pass-the-parcel, in a game where each rip brings ever shinier paper. There’s a crappy gift inside – but you haven’t the patience to find it.

I was most impressed by the ‘Gardens by the Bay’. They felt like an acid flash back – replete with gaudy art and space-ranch architecture. Think Day of the Triffids meets L. Ron Hubbard. 

The major downside was the heat. I left early in the morning, but my thighs were moister than an oyster on arrival. You can’t do much about that. I have to admit, it did cross my mind to strip down and run through the water spouts. What’s all this ‘reserved for children’ business anyway? Sounds like fascism, that’s what.

The Museum of Asian civilisations is also worth a look – they have a winning exhibit, it’s called air conditioning and free wifi. But you can’t do it all. I’d leave out Sentosa and the Zoo. If you’ve seen a real beach or wild animal they’ll feel second rate.

Right now, I’m ending the day at Raffles. My Singapore sling is finishing as expected – like thirty bucks worth of cough syrup always does. But, you know, the first sip was alright. And in the end, that’s all I’ll remember. So Singapore, you’re alright with me.

Whimsical arboretum or alien landing site?